Dear M. O'Toole,
Dear Idiots who are sitting on my husband's file, somewhere in this country,
I'm trying to leave you alone as much as I can but you know what? Nothing has changed into our fortress. Once again, we are facing another fucking wall of administrative stupidity.
Yes, I dare use the big F word. I dare to say it, thinking that somebody else in this country agrees about the fact that the Delay, Deny and Die reality is based on your extraordinary ability to make decisions that make no sense, cost so much more to the system but most importantly, make you ALL direct accomplices of my husband's pain.
Yes, Mister O'Toole.
The vet's spouse is premenopausing and expressing my anger is now a necessity. You see, I don't want to do arm, but I am becoming a little sensitive to bullshit.
Yes, Mister O'Toole: bullshit. Once again.
Look at the image: it's a joint of marijuana.
Do you need therapy to deal with your own emotions or perceptions regarding how the idea of marijuana makes you feel personally? How about those working at the treatment center? Those who are related in any ways?
Is it because Jenny Migneault is his wife? Better not. That would be giving me a little too much credit and I don't handle credit well.
Will you be afraid to shake my hand if I tell you that I am the one who introduced marijuana to my husband?
I mean: he was a real soldier for 20 years who stayed clean and knew when it was a good time to have a level of alcohol in the blood without being caught. But as for marijuana, even if he smoked before joining the CF, he came to believe that it was «unacceptable». A big No-No.
It took him years to be able to realize that this is the only thing that truly helps him. He had to:
1) Admit to his psychiatrist and psychologist that he was smoking pot. Come on. You know as a veteran what kind of courage it requires to be honest about something that could «potentially hurt a career»...with PTSD, it means that whatever is in his file, he's afraid it will affect his services and benefits with VAC. You know that, right?
2) Be able to truly identify (AND DESCRIBE) the benefits he feels and most importantly, to explain why and how it helps him, that's it's not a joke from a guy who just want to smoke pot to party with his friends. He can really make sense of the relation between his tinnitus, his PTSD and marijuana..how it helps him cope with everything. To have that level of self knowledge takes years for a military. You know that. You know that they are trained not to think about those thing for themselves. Mission comes first and you come last. You remember that fundamental rule too?
So when my husband tells Veterans Affairs Canada that he needs marijuana regarding conditions he is already pensioned for, it should be easy the minute all procedures as followed as prescribed by the producer and all proper paperwork is transmitted to the pharmacy for approval.
Guess what he is doing?
He's waiting, M. O'Toole. He is waiting for the approval so he can order MEDICAL marijuana instead of buying in on the streets, smoking Gods knows what.
He contacted the producer. They sent 3 times his prescription. It usually take a couple of days to receive the approval.
A month has gone by since.
My husband is waiting, M. O'Toole.
Do you know what waiting means?
He's angry, M. O'Toole. He becomes Rambo when he talks about it.
Do you know who deals with Rambo, M. O'Toole?
I fucking do.
So, understanding that you want the best for veterans, of course, your directions are clear when it comes for the well-being of your beloved community. Your own brothers and sisters in arms.
Then who the hell is sleeping on the switch? What's happening?
Too many demands?
Not enough budget?
Not enough staff?
What? Who? How? Why?
Shouldn't they be listening to you, the Minister?
Are you handling a tough crowd? Are they tired? Happy? Do they need help?
Should they smoke weed to become a little more sensible?
How come, if he would bring a damn prescription of Tylenols to the local pharmacist, the approval would be instantly given?
How come, if there is a problem, no one contacts my husband? HE is the one who should explain why he needs the pot to you. Not the producer. It's not of their damn business.
By the way.. what would happen if my husband was to get caught? Police, justice.. he would end up being penalized by the system????
Check this out:
We are into the DELAY part..
Soon, a lovely brown envelop will follow.. that will be the DENY part...
Question is: will our couple survive?
It was nice talking to you.
Thank you for letting me vent my anger this morning.
Time for me to go back. I have some waiting to handle.